How To Making Up In a Relationship

All relationships are bound to run into obstacles and also some type of problems, the best part of a relationship is making up after the fights. There are many different tips for making up in a relationship, and when a couple is able to take advantage of the fight to learn more about one another, they are generally able to maintain a healthier relationship and gain a more intimate relationship. There are many different tips that have been proposed by relationship gurus and experts. By looking at all of the different factors that affect a relationship and making up in a relationship in a healthy manner, couples are able to build a solid foundation of which can then enhance the experience that they have together.

One of the most important aspects is to acknowledge the reason for making up, and the reasons for fighting or even breaking up. It is important to consider where the relationship went wrong, the different perspective of both parties, and what exactly happened to cause a kink in the relationship. Couples that are able to get to the bottom of the problem are generally able to open up to another and also learn about the perspective that the other had during the fight. By being able to be empathetic and sympathetic with one another, both parties are generally able to learn from the experience and prevent further fights from happening. It is also important to acknowledge the reason for making up. This will include the feeling that both parties have for one another, and the beauty of the relationship. This will include where the relationship went right, and the type of feelings that both parties have for one another. When acknowledging what went wrong in the relationship, it is important to consider the different expectations that both parties have for the relationship. By being able to acknowledge the differences in the relationship, both parties are generally able to understand what the other party has been looking for.

It is also important to consider the agreements and the mutual decisions that have been made by both parties. With that being said, it is important to consider the type of decisions that both parties have decided on and to honor them. Do not make unfulfilled promises. Promises in relationship should be kept. It is important to consider the type of agreements that both parties made and the reasons behind the agreements. By being able to follow the agreements, both parties are able to acknowledge the importance of the relationship and stick to what they have decided were important to the both of them. By having the same values, it becomes a lot easier to maintain a healthy relationship.

One of the main tips for making up in a relationship is to not use sex as a reason for making up. This could have potentially bad psychological effects on the relationship, and could cause a habit to form. It may cause couples to be used to the idea of having sex after fighting and while physical contact could increase the intimacy in the relationship, the fights are potentially hazardous to the relationship and could cause the end of many of them. It is important to be able to make up in a relationship by simply communicating and understanding one another. By being able to better understand one another, couples are able to build a better relationship that is suited for both parties. It also helps avoid conflicts in the long run.

It is important to take the relationship one step at a time when making up in a relationship. While there may be a spark, it is important to consider all of the important aspects of the relationship and work on rebuilding the trust and romance that was there to begin with. This whole process will take some time, and a lot of communication. When making up in a relationship, it is important for both parties to be able to communicate with one another and figure out where the weakness in the relationship lies. By strengthening the relationship, both parties are able to attain a better relationship. Arguments and fights are not necessarily bad for the relationship. In fact, they can make the relationship better.

Is My Relationship Worth Saving?

A healthy, long lasting relationship takes time and a lot of hard work if it is to be successful. On a long enough time frame, all relationships go through rough times as well as easier times, ideally, the good times are worth all the work and effort of the bad times. Sometimes, couples just need to hang in there and continue working before they find peace.

There are also those relationships that are so toxic, they must end. The only way some people can find happiness is for the relationship to end. These relationships bring misery to their participants and doom them to an unfulfilled life.

But how do you know if your relationship is one of those? How do you know if you need to just hang in there or give it flick? Basically how do you know if a relationship is worth saving? To help you figure this out, here are a few questions you should first ask yourself.

Am I safe in this relationship?

The first and most important quality of any relationship is safety. Is it safe for you to be in this relationship? While being safe from physical violence is important, I’m not just talking about that. Are you safe from psychological abuse? Does your partner call you names, tease you, belittle and or humiliate you? Does your partner threaten you? Also does your partner isolate you from family, friends and/or the community? Do they manipulate you? Do they control you by withholding money from you? All these are indicators of a domestic violence situation. If you find any of these you need to leave this relationship as soon as possible. It is not just women who are at risk from domestic violence either; men are at just as much risk from violence by women.

What am I getting out of this relationship?

This is something most people don’t ask themselves often enough. What do we get out of our relationships or better yet, what is the benefit of being in this relationship? Why are you in it? As humans we need relationships because we get support, love, companionship, compassion, happiness, connection and hope from them. What are you getting out of your relationship?

Do I see a future with this person?

A successful relationship, ideally, lasts a lifetime. Let’s face it, we never meet anyone hoping that we’ll marry this person and divorce them afterwards. When we get into relationships, we intend to make them last. That’s why it’s crucial that we can see our partners in our future. Do you see your partner by your side in old age? If the answer is no, then this relationship is not worth saving, it’s due to end pretty soon.

Do you and your partner share the same goals and dreams?

In order to make a life and a future with another person, it is important that you share the same goals and dreams for that future. Everyone has dreams of how their future will be and attaining that dream will mean happiness for you. If two people have different dreams in a relationship, one of you or maybe both will end up unhappy because they have not fulfilled their dream. I was recently in a relationship and even though our relationship was good in so many areas, we had very different ideas for the future. I wanted to live in Sydney and have an exciting life. She wanted to live in the country and have a quiet life. Even though we tried hard to work it out so we could both be fulfilled, it was obvious one of us would end up very miserable in a life we didn’t want. Ultimately the relationship had to end so we could both be happy. Does your dreams conflict with your partners or do they work together?

Does my partner put as much work into the relationship than me?

A relationship is a two way street. For that street to work harmoniously, both partners need to put equal work into the relationship. When only one person puts in the work, that person often becomes overwhelmed, overloaded underappreciated and resentful, which is certain to end a relationship very quickly. Also, if your partner puts in little to no work in building, maintain and/or saving the relationship, that might be an indicator of how much (or correctly how little) they value the relationship. A relationship that your partner doesn’t value isn’t worth saving.

Hopefully the answers to these questions have helped you to clarify whether your relationship is worth saving. If you are still confused and unsure, I suggest you seek some counselling might help to make your decision.

Rodney is a qualified counsellor. He is the Founder and Facilitator of Bloke Support, an organisation that is dedicated to providing support to men facing emotional difficulties and creating awareness of mens issues. He also volunteers as a crisis telephone counsellor for Lifeline and works as a support worker in the mental health industry.

Healthy Relationships For Beautiful Life

In happy relationships, there are five simultaneous relationships happening. Healthy relationships are based upon each person having a relationship with him-or-herself. The relationship with the self is the basic building block of a relationship. Both parties must have broken through their denial systems to some extent, achieved some modicum of honesty with themselves, and become willing to take responsibility for themselves. In general, each must be a person in his or her own right. If one does not have a relationship with the self, it is truly impossible to have a living process (healthy) relationship; it will not be possible to be honest with the “other” if one is not in contact with oneself.

This relationship with the self is a source of pleasure and expansion and needs time and nurturing in order to grow. In order to have a relationship with the self, it is necessary to have quiet time alone, time to enrich one’s spirituality. A relationship with the self takes time. Truly having a relationship with our own process relates us to the process of the universe.

The next two relationships that occur in healthy relationships are each person’s fantasized relationship with the other. Each person has a fantasy about what is go in on with the other and about who the other is. In healthy relationships, it is necessary to bring these fantasized relationships into the conscious self, explore them, and make them available to and share them with the others. These relationships can be the source of a lot of fun, and as long as we know them for what they are, can add richness to our relationship with ourselves and with others.

A fifth relationship in healthy relationships is the actual relationship that exists between the two people. It is dependent upon the previous four having been developed, maintained, and “cleaned up” if necessary. Not that we have to be perfect to have a relationship; relationships provide a major arena for growth and self-awareness, and paradoxically they have to exist consciously and be worked with for the relationship between the self and other requires taking risks. In order to have this relationship, it is necessary to be able to see the self and the other and to respect the process of both. This relationship is a rich source of information for the self. And it is more than that; it is an opportunity to know and be known.

In healthy relationships, the focus is upon respecting one’s own process. When this happens, each – almost be default – respects the others journey and supports it as well as his or her own.

Healthy relationships imply supporting each other, yet these is no focus upon “fixing” the other person. Each person’s process is respected and it is recognized that each must do what he or she must. It is understood that if I have feelings about what the other does, these are my feelings and I have to handle them as best I can. Commitment is not incarceration. It is each being committed to her or his own process, sharing that process, and respecting the process of the others.

A healthy relationship is an open system, which means that both information that is external to the parties and the relationship are sought, listened to, and resolved. Therefore, in healthy relationships, choices are very important,, and the generation of options opens the possibility to growth and creativity. Choices are not threats.

Relationships are mysterious. Never-the-less, it is fun to play around with some “lists” of ideas for “healthy relationship skills.”

To be able to ‘wait with” the evolution of a relationship.

To be able to be honest when one is not interested or cannot listen.

To recognize and accept one’s own needs and honor them.

To care for, not take care of, the other.

To know that dependency in any form kills relationships; to honor the integrity of the self and the other.

To know that one cannot compromise one’s moral values without eroding the relationship.

To be present to the self and the other and share intimacy where appropriate.

To know that physical loving evolves as intimacy grows.

To know the relationship is only one important aspect of one’s total life.

To be unwilling to turn one’s life over to anyone.

To accept responsibility for one’s own life and recognize the others responsibility for his or her own life.

To be honest with oneself about who the other is and what important values, hopes and fears are not shared.

To see the other and the self clearly, without judgment.

To know that blame has no place in intimacy and to be willing to own one’s mistakes without judgment.

To be able to share “worlds” while maintaining one’s own.

To be present.

To take risks and be vulnerable with the other.

To share feelings as one feels them.

To have and respect boundaries.

To know that suffering is not love – pain will occur; suffering is a choice.

To live one’s own process and respect the process of the other, whatever it is.

To know that love cannot be created or manipulated. Love is a gift.